Sigh
As I think of my favorite pair of jeans
too tight to fit,
too faded to wear but still so hard to let go.
Familiarity is my security blanket,
Change leaves me stranded, bereft, bare, exposed.
There's no familiar groove,
No rhythm.
It's different.
Whether it's family or friends,
Knowing that you won't see them everyday
can leave you gasping for air,
Fighting back tears
Reminding yourself that you are too old for these childish things.
Maturity brings it's own burdens,
Now you have to sit properly,
Dress appropriately,
Mind your manners.
No more time for play or folly,
It's time to let go of mommy's hand
And venture out on your own.
Change is hard but inevitable,
Since we can't outrun it, let's embrace it.
Let's say goodbye to the old and welcome the new.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Time Away
Sometimes it is good to leave your present surrounding and travel to somewhere new. You may surprise yourself, you may be stronger than you think or weaker for that matter. You may discover that you really do not get along well with certain personalities and you may find a side of yourself that has been bidding its time and awaiting discovery.
My time away was overwhelming to say the least. It seems inadequate to describe it as a good, awesome or fantastic experience. How do I begin to formulate the tiredness I felt after traveling for nearly 24 hours, or the frustration I felt when I did not understand what was being said. How do I tell you of the little victories I celebrated each day when I understood a full sentence or when I was able to answer a question without first saying “repita por favor?” And there is certainly no way to express the love and respect I came to garner for my host family. There are not enough words to express how inadequate I felt at times when I could not translate from English to Spanish or vice versa fast enough, or when the words would not come out fast enough to fill the awkward silences after a question was asked. I cannot begin to describe the thick Andalusian accent and how incomprehensible it was. It is hard to describe my elation when I posted something for the first time, when I went I transacted business at Western Union, or when I asked for directions and understood what was said!! It is not sufficient to say I thought my program, CIEE, was amazing. CIEE not only had qualified, caring teachers, but they had someone you could consult for almost any problem, that arose, they organized field trips including one to Morocco , cultural excursions , workshops , volunteer opportunities and they even arranged for us to stay in hotels. It is not possible to adequately talk about our amazing group of 26 persons including me. Our group was small so we all knew each other and we were able to share our experiences with each other while it was happening. Inevitably, within our small group even smaller groups formed and I can truly say I believe I made at least 3 life-long friends. One cannot talk about time away without mentioning the amazing sensations one’s taste buds experienced. There was such a rich variety of food and the fruits and vegetables were always fresh. Everything seemed healthy, even fast food and tapas were a delectable treat that helped to plug the 6-7 hour gap between lunch and dinner. It behooves me to mention the walking, I walked everywhere and everyday, the narrow streets,the sometimes crazy driving and the need to press one’s back against a wall to ensure there was enough space for a car to pass by you.
Being in a new place is more than learning the language. It also involves learning the etiquette, body language, colloquial expressions, intonations, cultural faux pas, geography,style of dress and so much more. Being away has its advantages and disadvantages but it is difficult to sum up in one word. We don’t experience life in one dimension it is more like a multi-pronged approach, so sometimes when people ask me ‘how was your time abroad?’ I grapple within myself to give an appropriate one-worded response.
My time away was overwhelming to say the least. It seems inadequate to describe it as a good, awesome or fantastic experience. How do I begin to formulate the tiredness I felt after traveling for nearly 24 hours, or the frustration I felt when I did not understand what was being said. How do I tell you of the little victories I celebrated each day when I understood a full sentence or when I was able to answer a question without first saying “repita por favor?” And there is certainly no way to express the love and respect I came to garner for my host family. There are not enough words to express how inadequate I felt at times when I could not translate from English to Spanish or vice versa fast enough, or when the words would not come out fast enough to fill the awkward silences after a question was asked. I cannot begin to describe the thick Andalusian accent and how incomprehensible it was. It is hard to describe my elation when I posted something for the first time, when I went I transacted business at Western Union, or when I asked for directions and understood what was said!! It is not sufficient to say I thought my program, CIEE, was amazing. CIEE not only had qualified, caring teachers, but they had someone you could consult for almost any problem, that arose, they organized field trips including one to Morocco , cultural excursions , workshops , volunteer opportunities and they even arranged for us to stay in hotels. It is not possible to adequately talk about our amazing group of 26 persons including me. Our group was small so we all knew each other and we were able to share our experiences with each other while it was happening. Inevitably, within our small group even smaller groups formed and I can truly say I believe I made at least 3 life-long friends. One cannot talk about time away without mentioning the amazing sensations one’s taste buds experienced. There was such a rich variety of food and the fruits and vegetables were always fresh. Everything seemed healthy, even fast food and tapas were a delectable treat that helped to plug the 6-7 hour gap between lunch and dinner. It behooves me to mention the walking, I walked everywhere and everyday, the narrow streets,the sometimes crazy driving and the need to press one’s back against a wall to ensure there was enough space for a car to pass by you.
Being in a new place is more than learning the language. It also involves learning the etiquette, body language, colloquial expressions, intonations, cultural faux pas, geography,style of dress and so much more. Being away has its advantages and disadvantages but it is difficult to sum up in one word. We don’t experience life in one dimension it is more like a multi-pronged approach, so sometimes when people ask me ‘how was your time abroad?’ I grapple within myself to give an appropriate one-worded response.
Back Then
Back then things were so simple.
A smile held no guise, a hug was just that.
A kiss held no promise of more to come,
Hopefulness was still in tact.
Back then things were so simple.
I believed everything you said unquestioningly.
I had the faith of a child,
Everyday was an adventure waiting to be stumbled upon.
Back then things were so simple.
Homework that could be completed in 15 minutes,
No life-changing decisions to make,
No need to think further than today.
The hardest task to complete was obedience.
All my chores were done for me
LG!!
Back then things were so simple.
I saw everything through your eyes,
Loved like you loved,
Obeyed like my life depended on it,
Had unwavering faith.
Take be back then to when things were so simple,
Take me back to when I had faith like a child.
A smile held no guise, a hug was just that.
A kiss held no promise of more to come,
Hopefulness was still in tact.
Back then things were so simple.
I believed everything you said unquestioningly.
I had the faith of a child,
Everyday was an adventure waiting to be stumbled upon.
Back then things were so simple.
Homework that could be completed in 15 minutes,
No life-changing decisions to make,
No need to think further than today.
The hardest task to complete was obedience.
All my chores were done for me
LG!!
Back then things were so simple.
I saw everything through your eyes,
Loved like you loved,
Obeyed like my life depended on it,
Had unwavering faith.
Take be back then to when things were so simple,
Take me back to when I had faith like a child.
It's not easy
Life is filled with many things,
Some are scintillating and leaves one yearning for more,
Others leave a bitter taste in the mouth.
All must face unpleasantness,
We must run into it head-on,
We can't run, hide
or ask for a time out.
This is life,
It is the here and now.
Now may be the time for unpleasantness
But this too shall pass.
Some are scintillating and leaves one yearning for more,
Others leave a bitter taste in the mouth.
All must face unpleasantness,
We must run into it head-on,
We can't run, hide
or ask for a time out.
This is life,
It is the here and now.
Now may be the time for unpleasantness
But this too shall pass.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)